


The Prank War

by SarahDeLioncourt



Category: Interview With the Vampire (1994), Vampire Chronicles - Anne Rice
Genre: Arguing, M/M, Prank Wars, ridiculous vamps
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-03
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-10-14 06:15:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10530594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SarahDeLioncourt/pseuds/SarahDeLioncourt
Summary: Lestat and Armand are having an all out prank war. It seems like nothing can stop their ridiculous fight, but perhaps Louis knows a way.





	

David stumbled from the disaster that used to be the sitting room. "Fucking hell!" He panted, running to Louis' room. The dark haired vampire was lying on the bed, staring at the rug on the floor with such focus that David wondered if he was trying to commit the pattern to memory. "They've destroyed an entire room with this ridiculous war!"

"I know," Louis said, not looking away from the rug.

David began to pace. "I tried to break up the fight, and nearly got hit in the head with a PlayStation!"

"I know."

"And it's been going on for a week?! When are they going to tire themselves out?!"

Louis thought about this. "Given that Lestat and Armand are both incredibly stubborn, it's quite hard to say."

David stared at Louis, dumbfounded. "How are you so calm right now?"

Louis finally looked up to meet David's gaze. "At the beginning of the week, I was behaving as you are now. I have reached the point where I just can't bother myself to stress about it anymore. I'm hoping a meteor might strike the house and solve the problem for me."

"If only things were that easy," David replied, moving to sit on the bed. "I wouldn't have known about this whole thing if I hadn't stopped by to visit tonight," he thought aloud.

Louis gave a small smile. "You should probably leave while you still can."

David laughed. "How did this even start anyway?"

Louis sat up, and rested his head on David's shoulder. "Armand put green hair dye in Lestat's shampoo." David winced. "Then Lestat broke all of Armand's most beloved VHS tapes. It only spirals down from there."

"They are such children!" David huffed.

"Yes they are," Louis agreed. "I tried to reason with them many times, but they always said, 'Don't worry your pretty little head about it, Louis. We'll settle this. Stand off to the side now; we don't want you to get hurt.' I half thought about burning the house down with my secret supply of matches. They would have to stop fighting then." Louis looked about the room. "But it seemed like a shame for this place to burn down a second time."

David was quiet for a moment. "What if we called Marius?" He suggested.

"Given that he didn't reply to any of the seven messages I left him, I doubt that would be of any help. I suppose I don't blame him though. I would not want to get involved in this mess either." The sound of breaking glass followed by a string of French curses came from the living room. Louis turned back to David. "I would not think any less of you if you chose to leave."

David looked at Louis as if he were insane. "Are you kidding me?! I'm not leaving you alone with this!"

Louis chuckled. "Always the gentleman." He lied back down. "You can stay here if you like, or wherever it pleases you." David leaned over him, running a finger through his long dark hair. Louis gave a nod in answer to the unasked question. David leaned down and gave Louis a sweet kiss on the lips.

When he pulled away, he was suddenly struck by a thought. "Do you think if they saw us kissing, they would stop fighting?"

Louis found himself laughing so hard that it took him a moment to answer. "Only briefly." 

David smiled. "And why is that?"

"Well, they would both be very turned on, but the moment Lestat realized Armand was staring too, he would most likely get possessive and shout something about how we are his fledglings. Then the fight would simply begin anew."

"Damn, you're right!" 

Louis gave a small smile. "Afraid so." A yawn escaped his lips.

"Dawn's coming?" David asked. Louis nodded, and they both walked over to his coffin.

"I can get you another, if you'd like," Louis offered.

"Oh no, this is fine." It was a snug fit with both of them inside, but it was not uncomfortable. Closing the lid, they both managed to fall asleep fast, despite the loud noises coming from the other room. 

\---------

Louis and David were startled awake by the sound of the other two vampires yelling back and forth. "You have got to be kidding me," David growled. They opened the lid, and stepped out of the coffin. "There's no way they could have been arguing all night!"

Louis shrugged. "I'm guessing they collapsed where they were, only to wake up and resume fighting." Louis sighed. "This has been going on for too long. I'm putting an end to this." He strode confidently from the room.

"Put an end to it?" David asked, following behind him. "You said they wouldn't listen to you."

"No, they wouldn't." Louis sat down in a chair by the fireplace. "But I know what to do that will get them to stop."

"What?" David asked, suddenly confused. "Then why haven't you done it before?!"

Louis sighed. "It's a last resort. I was hoping it would be solved by now." 

David watched as Louis sat still, and was going to ask what his grand plan was, when a small whimper escaped the dark haired vampire's lips. His lips then began to quiver, and bloody tears started streaming down his cheeks. David was going to ask what was wrong, when the yelling from the other room suddenly stopped. It was quickly replaced by the sound of two people running down the hall. Lestat and Armand saw Louis crying, and immediately rushed to his side. They both knelt down in front of him, petting his hair and holding his hands. 

"What's wrong, mon cheri?" Lestat asked, concern written all over his face.

"Are you hurt?" Armand wondered, examining Louis from head to toe. Louis shook his head. "Then what is it?"

Lestat wiped at the tears flowing down his fledgling's face. "Tell us, cher. We'll fix it."

"I-I hate to see t-the both of you fi-i-ghting," Louis sobbed. "I love you both s-so much. I hate to see you hu-hurt each other."

Lestat and Armand immediately sat down on the armrests on either side of Louis, and tried to console him as best they could. They covered him with kisses, and held him tightly. "We'll stop fighting, cheri. I promise." Lestat cooed, placing a kiss on his fledgling's brow.

"We're sorry we upset you," Armand said, after kissing Louis' knuckles. "Are you okay now?" Louis wiped at his eyes, and looked up at the two beautiful men giving him their full attention and concern. Pretending that he was still a little shaken, Louis nodded and gave a tiny smile.

Despite this, the two vampires still fussed over Louis, worried that he might not have been completely honest with how he was feeling. Louis found himself having a hard time concentrating with all the attention he was being given, but was brought back to reality when he saw David standing there slack jawed. Louis had to use all of his strength to keep from laughing. He would never hear the end of it if Lestat and Armand found out that he had just pretended to cry. He spared David a quick wink, when the other two weren't looking.

David was so stunned, that he wasn't sure how to respond. Louis, who was known for being one of the weakest, had taken down two incredibly strong vampires without even lifting a finger. "I don't whether I should be impressed or terrified."


End file.
